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The Finale To Two Fresh Cops

Started by Andrew1911, July 16, 2007, 12:49:24 PM

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LCK

The clip show adds a nice touch.


:| :| :|

*comment

Andrew1911

Chapter Twelve: Boyah Headquarters

Detective Kaz threw the football over to Detective JMV. Kaz said, "Hey, partner... What did you think happened to Lawlz and LCK? They've been gone for a week and a half!" JMV shrugged and said, "I heard it had something to do with the Outsider Clan. You know that Lawlz has a vendetta against those guys..." Kaz nodded as JMV threw the football back. Detective Houdini said to Detective Bassir, "Hey, you ever wonder if the Outsiders got them?" Detective Bassir replied, "Nah, man. LCK and Lawlz got married or something. That's what I think."

All of a sudden, the doors to the Boyah Headquarters opened. Kaz dropped the football while JMV stuttered. Reaper came out of his office and said, "My God... Lawlz? Ieram?" Lawlz and LCK were all cut up, their clothes were ragged and wet, and LCK's arm was twisted backwards. Lawlz had a sack with him. LCK said, "Reaper... We need to talk."

*FLASHBACK*

Lawlz and LCK struggled against the water's strong current. The police wouldn't stop shooting at them. They had to keep swimming or else they would be doomed. Unfortunately, the stormy weather was keeping them from reaching their goal as the wind kept pushing them back to the island. Finally, after an hour of swimming, they had reached RT City. Lawlz vomited as LCK rolled on the sand. After Lawlz cleaned his mouth, he said, "LCK... We've got to get back to Boyah HQ." LCK shook his head. LCK replied, "We've got to take care of Warden Steal first."

They walked onto to the street and walked in front of a car. The driver stopped and shouted, "What the hell is wrong with you?" Lawlz grabbed the driver from the window and threw him onto the street. Lawlz said, "Police business. Back off." The two entered the car and headed back to where they escaped... Boyah Prison. LCK said, "Lawlz, we've got to use non lethal weapons. We can't harm the good guards. Let's move it." Lawlz punched the gas and they sped towards Boyah Prison.

LCK


Andrew1911


LCK


Andrew1911


LCK


Feynman


Andrew1911


Feynman

lets somehow turn this into an online podcast show

Andrew1911

July 18, 2007, 12:59:57 PM #70 Last Edit: July 18, 2007, 01:06:07 PM by Andrew1911
Chapter Thirteen: War, The Other White Meat

Reaper listened to Lawlz and LCK's tale of Warden Steal's evil and who Phydeaux told him who was next in line... Someone with the alias of Commodore Guff. Reaper hollered, "These Outsider fucks want a war? Guess what? THEY FUCKING GOT ONE!" Reaper stormed out of his office and screamed, "EJMVERY SINGLE DETECTIJMVE IN HERE RIGHT NOW, LISTEN UP! Lawlz and LCK have just informed me the Outsider Clan tried to have them killed. They want a war. Guess what? THEY'VE GOT ONE! I want every single detective to help Lawlz and LCK capture this Commodore Guff character. I have a feeling this will lead us to their leader. Everyone, head out! Lawlz, drop Steal off in the holding cell."

Everyone ran to the garage and entered their cars. LCK said, "Lawlz, you're finally going to get some good ol' fashioned revenge on the assholess who did this to Elessar." Lawlz said, "Yep... Let's roll." LCK said, "I'm putting some music in for this occasion." LCK put in The Rolling Stones' Their Satanic Majesties Request and '2000 Man' began to blare. All of the detectives revved their cars up and headed for an abadoned facility taken control by the Outsiders.

All of the detectives arrived at the facility and Lawlz said, "Alright, detectives. We're heading in strong and straight." JMV chuckled. Lawlz said, "Yeah, real funny, JMV. Anyway, we're all going to charge inside and take them by surprise. We might not all come back but we're getting this douche called Commodore Guff. What a lame name... Detectives, roll out!"

They all ran inside the dock and screamed, "IYPC POLICE! FREEZE!" As usual, the Outsiders decided to disregard their warning and fired at the detectives. They dived behind crates and LCK said, "Why don't these fools listen?" LCK grabbed two handguns, placed a toothpick in his mouth, and ran out of cover. He jumped onto a crate and fired his handguns at two henchmen at the same time. LCK dived off the crate and landed on the floor as he nailed three other henchmen. The detectives came out of cover and joined LCK.

Detective Kaz ran up the stairs and judo kicked a henchmen in the face. Kaz remarked, "Don't mess with the guy who's watched Firefly more than fifty times, bitch." Bassir grabbed a henchmen who was on the second floor and dragged him to the first floor while shooting another henchmen. JMV had a gun placed to his head by a henchmen. JMV waited for the perfect moment and broke the henchmen's arm, aimed the gun back at the henchmen, and fired blowing the henchmen's brains out. JMV said, "Yum... Brains."

V grabbed his trusty knives from his pocket and eyed three henchmen looking his way. V jumped towards them and threw three knives. His knives hit all three of them in the face. V said, "Bless you, Knife God of Alcatraz." Wrenchninja waited for a henchmen to walk his way. Wrenchninja eyed one coming his way and grabbed the henchmen's neck. He whispered into his ear, "Zed... Bring out the gimp." Wrenchninja snapped his neck and laughed.

LCK ran to the third floor and jumped on the banister, kicking a henchmen down and shooting another while getting behind a crate for cover. LCK saw an explosive barrel next to five henchmen. LCK smiled and said, "Thank you, cliche lord..." LCK waited for them to reload and ran towards the henchmen. LCK fired away at the barrel. The barrel exploded causing the five henchmen to go flying all over the place. LCK dodged the bodies flying at him and killed a henchmen who was still alive. Lawlz thought to himself, "Damn... I'm a good teacher."

Finally, all the detectives reached the fourth floor where Commodore Guff was located. Spiff was wheelchair bound due to an accident in the fourth grade when a bully decided it would be hilarous to hold him over the rooftop from a five story building. The results weren't as hilarous as the bully thought. Commodore Guff said, "Welcome, gentlemen. Ah, Lawlz... The Outsider Clan's old foe... You've been a thorn in the Outsider Clan for far too long, Lawlz... See, in my hand, I hold the self destruct button to blow up this entire facility. You all can leave now and spare your lives or foolishly kill me which would kill yourselves." Kaz laughed, "Dude, you don't have any explosives. You wouldn't do something so cliche."

Commodore Guff replied, "I do. Let me prove it." He pressed the button and a woman's JMVoice came over the intercom saying, "Self destruct in one minute." Spiff said, "Oh, shit... Look what you made me do!" Lawlz screamed, "Detectives, run! LCK, help me get Spiff out of here!" Lawlz grabbed a crate and smashed Spiff oJMVer the head with it to knock him out. They grabbed Spiff and ran down the fourth floor. The woman's voice returned and told them there was thirty seconds remaining. Lawlz came up with an idea from his years of watching Saturday morning cartoons. They put Spiff's body on the banister and used his body as a sled all the way down. They could still hear '2000 Man' playing as they went down.

The woman's voice came back on and it was ten seconds left as they reached the first floor. They grabbed his body and ran out of the facility. The woman's voice returned and told them self destruct mode initiated. The facility exploded as Lawlz and LCK jumped with Spiff's body to get away from the explosion. They had made it. LCK asked, "How the hell did you figure that one out?" Lawlz answered, "A genius by the name of Chuck Jones." LCK asked, "The singer?" Lawlz smacked LCK.

Andrew1911


Andrew1911

Chapter Fourteen: The Delicious Taste of Royal Jewel Ice Cream Sandwiches

Lawlz and LCK headed back to the station with Commodore Guff in the back seat when they got a craving for the delicious flavor of Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwiches. The cruncy beauty of the two cookie which hold the sensual vanilla ice cream inside... Lawlz said, "Dude, are you thinking what I'm thinking?" LCK said, "Only if you're thinking Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwiches!" Commodore Guff said, "Hey, did I hear someone mention Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwiches?"

They reached the station and all three got a Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwich. Lawlz moaned in ectasy as he took a huge bite of the beautifully hand crafted treat. LCK sighed as the ice cream rolled down the back of his throat, tickling all the way down. Commodore Guff cried when he finished the entire thing. Lawlz said, "Hey, turn that frown upside down! You can have seconds if you tell us who's the big jerk behind this whole thing!" Commodore Guff lit up and said, "GIMME GIMME GIMME!"

Commodore Guff was handed another Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwich which can be bought from rubyjewel.com at affordable prices for all. Commodore Guff savored each bite of the Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwich. When he finished, he licked his hands and the wrapper which showed there were very few calories and fat in the whole ice cream sandwich.

Finally, Commodore Guff was ready to tell Lawlz and LCK who the big cheese was... Commodore Guff cleared his throat several times to make sure the delicious Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwich would not interfere with the very important thing he was about to say. Commodore Guff adjusted his crotch. Lawlz wipped his brow. LCK did not blink his eyes.

Commodore Guff uttered...



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