I just spotted a house centipede in my room. ON MY BED. I went to get some crushing supplies and I came back and now I can't find it.
Fuck. That.
Sleeping is clearly not an option at this point. I did a hell of a job shaking out my sheets but I still can't be too sure.
HELP ME YOU GUYS THIS IS SERIOUS.
Buy a scorpion and release it into your bed. It will eat the centipede like a pro.
then eat scorpion and have baby centipedes burst out of the scorpions stomach that is in you stomach that then burst out of your stomach and crawl back into bed
do that
I told you this was serious. IF THIS WAS NOT SERIOUS I WOULD BE LAUGHING BUT THIS IS FUCKING SERIOUS. srs
shoot his mom
at least there aren't like a shitton of spiders under your bed
just, sit, and watch, and fall asleep in your chair.
UPDATE TIME.
I spotted the fucker on my wall so I trapped it under a dixie cup which I then stuffed with toilet paper. I went back to the toilet to release it, and when I unstuffed the cup IT WAS GONE WHAT THE SHIT WHEN DID THESE THINGS LEARN TO SORCERY?
So then I went back to my room and saw it on the floor near aforementioned wall and did the same routine only successfully and flushed it and now it's gone.
CRISIS AVERTED.
[spoiler]Also those things are pretty good swimmers.[/spoiler]
how will you shit now with the constant fear of it crawling up your ass? HOW
Pssh. Not like that's any scarier than toilet snakes, except toilet snakes are a real threat.
Flush a fire scorpion down the toilet, it'll eat the centipede and turn into a water scorpion. Then return to the ocean with the rest of it's family. bassir;
Quote from: Indigo on June 20, 2010, 01:46:48 AM
Flush a fire scorpion down the toilet, it'll eat the centipede and turn into a water scorpion. Then return to the ocean with the rest of it's family. bassir;
this was what i said you asshole
FUCK
One centipede on your bed means one hundred underneath it. My weekend house has like 3 centipedes a year, and my badass father sprays over cleaner on them until they wither and die. They must talk to their little centipede friends and say "Fuck this house, we'll go next door!!"
there's a millipede crawling up your back right now
Buy a tarantula, let it eat the bugs in your house, then get rid of it.
Because arachnids are gross and oh god why do they have so many legs or dear god the legs and the beady little eayes oh god I need a shower
It shat all over your bed.
OH GOD MAN I FEEL YOUR PAIN
One night I was walking to the bathroom and heard light shuffling and i look down and the thing sprinted at me and I like jumped into my bathroom onto the counter. I COULD HEAR ITS FEET MAN AS IT TRIED TO KILL ME. Then I never saw it again it is probably plotting my demise at this instant wry
I've never seen a centipede inside my house, actually i have only seen one in my entire life. There was one at the tennis courts and my friend decided he wanted to keep it in a water bottle as a pet, so we helped him catch it and poke holes into the water bottle, and he put it in his tennis bag. He'd come check on it like every 10 minutes. Then he got this girl in tennis mad and she came to his bag and took out the centipede and violently shook up the bottle as much as she could and she killed the poor thing. So my friend went to his bag to go check on his new 'pet' and it was all dead and messed up, he freaked out, i was the only one that saw her do that, and she told me not to tell...so he probably thinks it like had a seizure or something?
Quote from: BlackDS on June 20, 2010, 07:15:27 AM
One centipede on your bed means one hundred underneath it. My weekend house has like 3 centipedes a year, and my badass father sprays over cleaner on them until they wither and die. They must talk to their little centipede friends and say "Fuck this house, we'll go next door!!"
Not to troll or whatever, but I don't get why there is a face on my post. Wtf.
Quote from: BlackDS on June 20, 2010, 01:16:34 PM
Not to troll or whatever, but I don't get why there is a face on my post. Wtf.
I don't see a problem. Your post is just more badass that way. That's all.
sigh, I should just stop asking questions
Quote from: BlackDS on June 20, 2010, 05:39:47 PM
sigh, I should just stop asking questions
You're not badass enough to ask questions. BOW WOW WOW
House centipedes eat roaches and things. Even other house centipedes. Even so, I wouldn't want to keep them around just for that reason. I'd much rather just have a can of Raid to deal with bugs.
Whenever I kill a spider and pick it up with some toilet paper, I like to put the spider side down into the toilet, so it's like there's a layer of soon to be wet toilet paper. If me smashing it didn't kill it, it's gonna drown.
Quote from: Man of Popsicle on June 20, 2010, 01:09:57 AM
toilet snakes
I saw a show a long time ago, when I was about 7 or 8 or something. Might've been Cops, I dunno. Anyway, there was a snake in some dude's toilet. He went to go take a dump, and the snake slithered out of the pipes and bit his ass. I was afraid to poop for weeks.
Quote from: Claquesous on June 20, 2010, 08:40:16 PM
House centipedes eat roaches and things. Even other house centipedes. Even so, I wouldn't want to keep them around just for that reason. I'd much rather just have a can of Raid to deal with bugs.
Whenever I kill a spider and pick it up with some toilet paper, I like to put the spider side down into the toilet, so it's like there's a layer of soon to be wet toilet paper. If me smashing it didn't kill it, it's gonna drown.
I saw a show a long time ago, when I was about 7 or 8 or something. Might've been Cops, I dunno. Anyway, there was a snake in some dude's toilet. He went to go take a dump, and the snake slithered out of the pipes and bit his ass. I was afraid to poop for weeks.
pff, you could have just shat really fast, so the evil toilet snakes would bite your shit instead of your ass