Story time: ask boyagers about shitty events in their life

[YPrrrr]

who here likes hummus

who the the heck doesn't

idk it is sort of boring~~~

But I don't like chickpeas much so

[ME##]

ypr how was getting ur @ss kicked in fifa by me

[ncba93ivyase]

oh lawlz i can ask you about shitty events in your life 

What was your first thought when you woke up and your girlfriend was gone?

The night before she'd claimed she was going downtown to a symphony with a female friend. She hadn't talked to this alleged friend in about a year and she'd changed her number in the meantime, so just as a test, I asked her if she had this friend's number so that they'd call each other and make sure they're meeting in the right place.

"Oh, no... but it'll be fine."

She went to go get a shower and for the first time I decided to check her text messages. I noticed she'd deleted most of them (because she was texting who she claimed was a female friend all day but there were like 20 texts in her inbox max), but I saw one outgoing text to some about 10 days ago that said, "Awww you're so sweet "

I knew exactly what was happening then.

She got out of the shower and wanted me to help dress her up, and since that was my only evidence against her, I decided to play along and just ask more questions to test her and see if I could get her to admit anything. All of her answers were suspicious but nothing that I could 100o/o use against her. I zipped her up in a nice dress that she never even wore for me and I felt bad.

She left around 6PM and said she definitely wouldn't be back later than 11. I got a call at 11:45 and she was laughing a lot and I knew something was fucked up. I told her I loved her on the phone (more to see if she'd actually say it), and after 10 seconds of silence, "...I love you too..."

She gets back home and jumps into my arms and gives me a huge kiss (which is disgusting now that I think about it) and tells me she loves me and wants to spend time with me before she goes to bed. I say that something's been off lately and I want to talk about our problems. She's still smiling and agrees to sit down and listen, and when I ask if she thinks there's anything wrong, she says everything's just fine. She then claimed to be extremely tired and wanted to go to bed. I went to bed an hour later.

I woke up around 9AM because I heard her walking around the house. She saw me wake up and said, "Don't worry--I'm not going jogging" (she'd been jogging, or so she claims, for the past few weeks). I fell back asleep and woke up again around noon. She wasn't back yet, so I started to worry. I called her and didn't get a response. Texted her and got nothing. I knew she'd left permanently due to her behavior last night but I didn't know where the fuck she was. Around 2:30 or so I get a response saying, "I just need some time alone right now."

I later found out she spent the whole day with him and was sleeping at his house. When I bumped into her the next day and got her to admit she was sleeping at his place, she said he was the "least biased person in the situation and I'm only there to clear my mind."

The past few months have been awful, but hey, I realize that this shit would've happened eventually and I'm glad it happened before I married such a crazy bitch. I could've lost a house or kids. Thankfully I only lost about $15000 to her.

[ncba93ivyase]

also more fun: she left october 5th

according to friends, her facebook profile says she's been with this since september 25th

[YPrrrr]

ypr how was getting ur @ss kicked in fifa by me

idk if we had played I'd tell you

[ncba93ivyase]

ypr why did you go from being a good catholic boy to someone who's had sex with 09238420 women

[ME##]

ypr how was getting ur @ss kicked in fifa by me

idk if we had played I'd tell you

get the world cup edition, at least there's no chance of you getting that for the ps4 ||

[Patrick Stickles]

also more fun: she left october 5th

according to friends, her facebook profile says she's been with this since september 25th

woof fuck that

[??????]

also more fun: she left october 5th

according to friends, her facebook profile says she's been with this since september 25th

ahahahahah
that's awful

also chickpeas are better than hummus
hummus is just gross

[YPrrrr]

ypr why did you go from being a good catholic boy to someone who's had sex with 09238420 women

because i became convinced there are basically 0 women who are willing to wait for sex without being obsessed with religion to an extent that is obnoxious. I'm probably wrong but it's hard to date within those parameters

Also the number is 2 lol

[Hippopo]

ypr why did you go from being a good catholic boy to someone who's had sex with 09238420 women

because i became convinced there are basically 0 women who are willing to wait for sex without being obsessed with religion to an extent that is obnoxious. I'm probably wrong but it's hard to date within those parameters

Also the the the the number is 2 lol

the the women who were willing to wait and aren't completely ugly/crazy have already gotten married... So you missed that boat anyways.

[YPrrrr]

ypr why did you go from being a good catholic boy to someone who's had sex with 09238420 women

because i became convinced there are basically 0 women who are willing to wait for sex without being obsessed with religion to an extent that is obnoxious. I'm probably wrong but it's hard to date within those parameters

Also the the the the number is 2 lol

the the women who were willing to wait and aren't completely ugly/crazy have already gotten married... So you missed that boat on that one anyways.

So they got married young to avoid much of a wait is what you're saying

[ncba93ivyase]

me9823748932 i know absolutely fucking nothing about your life except that you seem to have a job

tell us what happened to you post-high school and why you are who you are today

[Hippopo]

ypr why did you go from being a good catholic boy to someone who's had sex with 09238420 women

because i became convinced there are basically 0 women who are willing to wait for sex without being obsessed with religion to an extent that is obnoxious. I'm probably wrong but it's hard to date within those parameters

Also the the the the the the the the number is 2 lol

the the the the women who were willing to wait and aren't completely ugly/crazy have already gotten married... So you missed that boat on that one anyways.

So they got married young to avoid much of a wait is what you're saying

Idk their reason, but that might be apart of it.

[??????]

why don't you have a cute boyfriend hippo
were you always proud of your weight classictyler