How did Anthony's weiner manage to stray from someone like Huma Abedin anyway?

[Kalahari Inkantation]

Jesus Christ.

[C.Mongler]

yeah bro if u dont wanna smash i will ayyy

[YPrrrr]

Lesbian bed death

[Kalahari Inkantation]

[spoiler]

[/spoiler]

There's just something about that arrogant, elitist, smartly-dressed, exotic pretty look that's kind of tantalizing. Right?

[Kalahari Inkantation]

Lesbian bed death

...i don't like what i think you're implying

huma abedin is too pure for that

[YPrrrr]

I'm just being silly but it's probably true that people do get bored having sex with the same person even if they're fine

[Kalahari Inkantation]

But how could anyone ever grow bored of that constant expression of moderate annoyance? :'(

[spoiler]





[/spoiler]

and of course she's an iphone user

why wouldn't she be

...and why does that somehow only make her more alluring

[Kalahari Inkantation]

and those TEETH

[spoiler][/spoiler]
[spoiler][/spoiler]

There's a reason she never bares her teeth except in the extremely rare candid photo. You just know she's self-conscious about that toothy grin.

[YPrrrr]

My favorite Abedin... She's... cute... lovely... smart... plus... iPhone... amazing... you think so?... oh yes... it's... stunning... kindly... love it! Hug it... when... sleeping... warm and cuddly... spectacular... moderate annoyance... ravishing...

[Kalahari Inkantation]

i'm glad at least someone agrees

You know, I hear she's single and quite lonely these days.

should... should i invite her to boyah

Do you think she'd appreciate this topic?

[YPrrrr]

I'm all for inviting her to boyah

I don't know that she would appreciate any of our topics however I'm sure we would really encourage her moderate annoyance

[Kalahari Inkantation]

A rough draft of what I'm going to send her:

My Dearest Huma Abedin,

I simply cannot fathom how Anthony's wiener managed to stray from someone like you. There is just something about your arrogant, elitist, smartly-dressed, exotic pretty look that I find endlessly tantalizing. How could Mr. Wiener ever grow bored of your constant expression of moderate annoyance?

I see that you're an iPhone user. I fully acknowledge the superiority of iOS and the iPhone over Android. I welcome you to treat me like the poor, glitchy Google worm I am.

Please don't be ashamed or self-conscious of your slightly oversized teeth and goofy grin. I find them endearing and humanizing. Hah, get it?

I hear you are single and quite lonely these days. Would you care to join us over on http://boyah.net/forums? We are your biggest remaining fans, and I think you would greatly appreciate our wide selection of interesting topics.

We would be honored to have you here, glaring angrily at us out of the corner of your eye. You can even browse and post via your superior iPhone.

Your not-so-secret admirer,

Tec

I'm sure we would really encourage her moderate annoyance

moderately annoyed huma is best huma

[Kalahari Inkantation]

I've figured it out.

[spoiler][/spoiler]

It's that distinct air of unattainability that makes her particularly appealing.

[spoiler][/spoiler]

[Kalahari Inkantation]

She is completely out of my league.

[spoiler][/spoiler]

[spoiler][/spoiler]

[Kalahari Inkantation]

And she knows it.

[spoiler][/spoiler]