Family Gatherings

[6M69I69B9]

I fucking hate family gatherings.  It's always awkward for me. 

I had to go to a family gathering for a cousin's graduation celebration.  And lol, I just sat in a corner waiting for the party to end.  I'm always my most anxious with them, specifically.  Everyone just seems to have it all figured out there, and I can never engage in a conversation with them about...anything.  It'll all be small talk.  For some reason I just can't be my comfortable self with them.  I just wanted to go because I wanted to be there for my cousin, who really struggled progressing with education.  Though, I think maybe I should have just signed a card and told my brother to give it to her lol.  But yeah, it's not like I have anything against anybody there.  But these gatherings seem so forced, I just can't approach them naturally.

I think I'm just going to go with Christmas gatherings and that's it. 

[rdl]

its hard for me bc my family is white and i am black