"Thank you for choosing comcast as your service provider"

[Daddy]

no fuck you i din't choose you i had no choice fuck you comcast

[ME##]

THANK YOU MUNICIPAL GOVERNMENT FOR CHOOSING MY CABLE AND TELEPHONE PROVIDER

[silvertone]

comcast isnt so bad.

[strongbad]

cuck fomcast

[Samus Aran]

when are they gonna just completely abandon the name comcast in favor of xfinity all across the board

[Tri4se]

ya

[strongbad]

when are they gonna just completely abandon the name comcast in favor of xfinity all across the board

xfinity is so gay

[Daddy]

YOu'e gay david

[strongbad]

wow
fuck you asshole

[Boogus Epirus Aurelius]

Hey, read this. True story about comcast, or what I like to call them; ComBlastMyAss.

Uncle wakes up one day, right, and goes down to the kitchen to put the coffee pot on when he notices the window over the sink has a little crack in it. Goes over to investigate and notices that it isn't just a crack. It's a hole. There's a hole in the windowpane about the size of a fifty cent piece.

That isn't all, though.

There's a cable running through the hole, right? A black cable with one word printed over and over across the cable, in yellow, comic sans letters. Know what the word was?

Comcast.

Uncle's trying to put the pieces together but he can't. "Why's there a hole in me window?"(he's irish),he thinks (to the tune of Julia Delaney). Instead of investigating more, he pours a bowl of lucky charms into a bowl, adds a splash of Cutty Sark and some milk and tries to shake off sleep.

But, by the second bite, he starts to hear the pounding. Loud noises coming from his roof. So, he gets up to walk out of the kitchen, but before he can make it, he trips over the black cable and smashes his nose into the kitchen counter. Breaks the thing. He's gushing enough blood to fill a pint glass.

After stemming the flow, he decides to follow the cable, see where it goes. The cable runs through his front hallway, through a hole punched in his wall, though his downstairs bathroom and back out again, and into his computer. More specifically his computer monitor. Through the front of his computer monitor. Feckin' thing's tossed completely.

Uncle kicks open the door and sees that the cable runs up the side of his house, to the roof. His entire roof is full of holes covered in black and yellow Comcast cables. He can barely see any shingles anymore. He hears a voice from behind him. "Hey, you're finally up old-timer. Since I'm all done installing your premium package, I just need you to sign right here". Comcast guy is standing there, holding out a clipboard with a piece of scrap paper on it.

Comcast guy sees my uncle's look of disbelief and rolls his eyes. "Just sign the goddamn paper, gramps. I've been working for almost two hours now. I barely have time to catch The Price Is Right the way it is".

Comcast guy turns around, startled by a noise behind him. Just a woman walking her dog. Comcast guy pulls out a small caliber pistol and shoots the dog three times. Three short reports, and the thing falls dead. Turns back to my uncle like nothing happened.

"Everything's ready in there, pops. Full package. Internet...well just internet. Maybe, I don't know. Installation fee comes to fourteen grand."

In a daze, my uncle signs the paper and Comcast guy flicks him off and speeds away on a tiger orange Vespa.

[silvertone]

Hey, read this. True story about comcast, or what I like to call them; ComBlastMyAss.

Uncle wakes up one day, right, and goes down to the kitchen to put the coffee pot on when he notices the window over the sink has a little crack in it. Goes over to investigate and notices that it isn't just a crack. It's a hole. There's a hole in the windowpane about the size of a fifty cent piece.

That isn't all, though.

There's a cable running through the hole, right? A black cable with one word printed over and over across the cable, in yellow, comic sans letters. Know what the word was?

Comcast.

Uncle's trying to put the pieces together but he can't. "Why's there a hole in me window?"(he's irish),he thinks (to the tune of Julia Delaney). Instead of investigating more, he pours a bowl of lucky charms into a bowl, adds a splash of Cutty Sark and some milk and tries to shake off sleep.

But, by the second bite, he starts to hear the pounding. Loud noises coming from his roof. So, he gets up to walk out of the kitchen, but before he can make it, he trips over the black cable and smashes his nose into the kitchen counter. Breaks the thing. He's gushing enough blood to fill a pint glass.

After stemming the flow, he decides to follow the cable, see where it goes. The cable runs through his front hallway, through a hole punched in his wall, though his downstairs bathroom and back out again, and into his computer. More specifically his computer monitor. Through the front of his computer monitor. Feckin' thing's tossed completely.

Uncle kicks open the door and sees that the cable runs up the side of his house, to the roof. His entire roof is full of holes covered in black and yellow Comcast cables. He can barely see any shingles anymore. He hears a voice from behind him. "Hey, you're finally up old-timer. Since I'm all done installing your premium package, I just need you to sign right here". Comcast guy is standing there, holding out a clipboard with a piece of scrap paper on it.

Comcast guy sees my uncle's look of disbelief and rolls his eyes. "Just sign the goddamn paper, gramps. I've been working for almost two hours now. I barely have time to catch The Price Is Right the way it is".

Comcast guy turns around, startled by a noise behind him. Just a woman walking her dog. Comcast guy pulls out a small caliber pistol and shoots the dog three times. Three short reports, and the thing falls dead. Turns back to my uncle like nothing happened.

"Everything's ready in there, pops. Full package. Internet...well just internet. Maybe, I don't know. Installation fee comes to fourteen grand."

In a daze, my uncle signs the paper and Comcast guy flicks him off and speeds away on a tiger orange Vespa.

that happened to my uncle 2 except instead he shot at hte comcast guy while he was onthe roof and he fell from the roof and is now paraplegic lol

[Socks]

haha seriously that is my basement area after i 'upgraded' to FIOS. if you try to follow the wires and connections it leads to holes and then knots and then more holes and they go in and out of the door, walls and ceiling. there are some flashing lights and black boxes but it might as well be the fucking NSA i have no idea what is going on down there.

[Travis]

ComBlastMyAss.

im crying