crimes you'd commit if you'd be completely absolved of them guaranteed

[ncba93ivyase]

i would probably throw bags of steaming shit on people's windshields

[ME##]

[spoiler]⇩load a gf [/spoiler]

[Daddy]

i'd steal money

[strongbad]

steal digital goods

[The artist formally known]

Download all movies, music, video games, and books I want. 

[snoorkel]

i'd steal money

^

Download all movies, music, video games, and books I want. 

steal digital goods

you guys are funny

[applesauce]

uh

[snoorkel]

uh

u'd rape hehe

[silvertone]

rape of nanking in philly

[Feynman]

Coerce the Supreme Court into declaring gerrymandering unconstitutional.

[FAMY2]

i would probably throw bags of steaming shit on people's windshields

you can do better than that can't you?

[Hiro]

who the fuck would not rob a bank

[snoorkel]

who the fuck would not rob a bank

i would blow up the USA

[chainsaw unicorn]

Id kidnap a whole bunch of people and then force them to have Caligula-esque orgies with each other

[strongbad]

i would blow up the USA

truth