i wish i knew employees of your participating retailer

[??????]

because it would make shoplifting easier

itt: if you shoplift![spoiler]i am a cop[/spoiler]

[Daddy]

i never steal.

[??????]

i never steal.

you stole my innocence

[snoorkel]

back in minneapolis when I drove around doing drugs every day there was this one grocery store parking lot that we would always park in, and occasionally use the store's bathrooms to clean up before we went home. I stole smoked oysters, kipper snacks, and shortbread cookies from there pretty often .... the protip is to where a coast, covertly grab the item and stash it in an inside pocket, go to the bathroom, unbox/unwrap it to get rid of any RFID tags that might be there, then discard the wrapper and quickly leave!!! (maybe stash 5-6 things and buy 1 at the checkout to throw them off!!!)

I don't do this anymore though.