Is this the internet...?

[Sarcastically Insane]

Hm, strange world indeed.

Hello.
My name shall remain unstated.
I came from the depths of one of the polar ice caps. See, it's a long story...

As a child, my mother would always dazzle me with stories of a jolly old man in red clothing named Santa. Since those years, I decided that it was my duty as a would-be man to find this Santa, and simply give him my thanks. After taking a bus to the train station that led to the airport that led to Santa's domain, I had finally come to the throne of lore; Santa's workshop. Little did I know, the so called workshop was actually a textile factory of James Bond proportions. I asked the man at the front desk if I could please speak with a Mr. Santa, and out came this creature. It had no red clothing, nor was it jolly in any way. The elves, rather, short men with needlessly white skin and pointy hats, had been informed by the United Postal Service that their leader, Santa, was no longer needed in order to deliver Christmas gifts to children across the world. There now existed things called "Amazon" and "eBay," which not only let you purchase a gift of choice, but also delivered it personally to your house. A personal Santa, so to speak. The pre-existing Santa wanted this "mindless de-evolution" to be put to an end, so he sent a troop of elves to excavate to the center of the north pole in order to find some power source. The terrors that awaited the poor troop of elves shall not be mentioned. Their fate was a sad one, but Santa failed to care. He had finally reached the ominous key that could put an end to the online stores' madness. Little did he know that this mysterious object had a side effect when brought into warm temperatures; it mutated and deformed its keeper. This merciless mutant Santa is the cause of my grief. After my calm "Hello," I was instantaneously lifted into the air and thrown out the window of his workshop. I saw a strange figure jump outward from the chimney; it was him. He landed on the ground with a force rivaled by that of the bomb of Hiroshima. It created a large opening in the ice that led to my temporary freezing.

I was later discovered by an unknown party and revitalized in their facility. After that, I wanted to do more research on this "internet" that had destroyed what used to be a happy childhood memory.

That is the story of my origins.

Thank you to any and all who have taken the time to read the entire story.


All that aside, how's it going, everybody? :P

[Bushy]

GTFO

NO TEXT WALLS

[Sarcastically Insane]

GTFO

NO TEXT WALLS

... But... I worked so hard on it... just to impress you...

Besides, I was invited.

[Bushy]

GTFO

NO TEXT WALLS

... But... I worked so hard on it... just to impress you...

Besides, I was invited.

All you really have to say is "Hey guys, lol. *name* invited me flower;"

[Sarcastically Insane]

GTFO

NO TEXT WALLS

... But... I worked so hard on it... just to impress you...

Besides, I was invited.

All you really have to say is "Hey guys, lol. *name* invited me flower;"

... But I wanted to tell a story instead. :P

[Placebo Headwound]

Silly SI, everyone knows Santa is really a gorilla! awesomelon;

The Cybernetic Ghost Of Christmas Past From The Future said so himself. sherlock;

Anyways, I'm the one who invited this guy.

[Reverse Psychology]

tl;dr

[demonprince]

No, Its a series of tubes.

[Samus Aran]

EXCUSE ME GOOMBA MAN

NSIDER NAME PLZ

ALSO NICE TEXT WALL  magician;

[The artist formally known]

I LIKE THIS GUY A LOT EVEN THOUGH I DID NOT READ ANY OF HIS THREE POSTS  caterpie;

[Sarcastically Insane]

EXCUSE ME GOOMBA MAN

NSIDER NAME PLZ

ALSO NICE TEXT WALL  magician;

Technically my NSider name is the same as my name here, only all caps and with no space between the words.

Note: Hand crafted text wall. :P

[Reverse Psychology]

ur mom's an internet lol

[LCK]

I knew that name sounded familiar.

http://forums.nintendo.com/nintendo/view_profile?user.id=83111

[Necro]

tl;dr

[Sarcastically Insane]

I knew that name sounded familiar.

http://forums.nintendo.com/nintendo/view_profile?user.id=83111

Yep... one reason I keep this name on most forums.