Help me be less insecure

[rdl]

do you swim for other people to be jealous of your skills, or do you do it for yourself? it seems to me like you're too preoccupied with showing off

[??????]

It might have to do with how most of my friends really excel in certain things (sports, etc) and I always come in 2nd. And most of my friends have had plenty of girlfriends throughout high school and I have not. Those things are just constant reminders that I'm not good enough.

You have to realize that your friends probably don't really care about the things they do, they just "do it" because it is what they love, and that motivates them to do their very best earning them a high rank. Whatever accomplishments they do should not have any value or meaning for you, because you didn't have the choice to control their actions (Winning and getting girlfriends, for instance) so they're really not "good", nor are they "bad". What really is "good" and "bad" are the decisions you make by yourself. This is what you have complete control over.

do you swim for other people to be jealous of your skills, or do you do it for yourself? it seems to me like you're too preoccupied with showing off

well some people are motivated by external factors, so his form of motivation may be more extrinsic (Which isn't really a bad thing.) If he feels more motivated if he gains social approval, and less if they show disapproval, then he is motivated extrinsically. (Me and Socks are motivated from within, despite what anyone says--that includes both good and bad reactions.) People motivated extrinsically wise are more prone to falling in depression or anxiety, because their ego is tied in with whatever their doing leaving them incredibly exposed.

[strongbad]

Michael Phelps would like to have a word with you.

Let me rephrase that:
Nobody gives a shit about high school swimming.

[strongbad]

Confidence is hard for me too, but without it you will miss out on many opportunities that you might never be able to get again.

Yeah, this is what I've realized, and I'm doing my best to get more confident. It's starting to work, but that's mostly because I've had nothing but good news in the last few days.

And I will thank you shawn <3

well some people are motivated by external factors, so his form of motivation may be more extrinsic (Which isn't really a bad thing.) If he feels more motivated if he gains social approval, and less if they show disapproval, then he is motivated extrinsically. (Me and Socks are motivated from within, despite what anyone says--that includes both good and bad reactions.) People motivated extrinsically wise are more prone to falling in depression or anxiety, because their ego is tied in with whatever their doing leaving them incredibly exposed.

This does a really good job describing me and my actions. but yeah i can definitely relate to the last part ;-;

[??????]

This does a really good job describing me and my actions. but yeah i can definitely relate to the last part ;-;

JMV said I was retarded  
[spoiler]"WHy dont you already just kill yourself and stop plaguing the world with your retardation of ruining everyon'es fucking life"[/spoiler]

PLANT BOTANISTS KNOW EVERYTHING
Also PM me (Admins intrude your privacy) or just IM for more help 

[strongbad]

Okay will do <3

[Samus Aran]

clucky can help anyone...but herself :'(

[YPrrrr]

clucky can help anyone...but herself :'(

Irony is a cold and cruel mistress

[??????]

clucky can help anyone...but herself :'(

A staple within the psychological community.
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