STORY RATE/10

mariofreak55 · May 05, 2007, 11:27:02 PM

Ignore the crappy formatting and the fact that I wrote it all in the last hour for the easy A.

   “It’s bring your son to work day!” said my dad while he was making breakfast, the usual pancakes.   “So I don’t have to go to school?” I asked, while taking my own pancakes off of the stove and covering it with syrup and fruit.
   Taking his own pancakes, he replied enthusiastically, “You sure don’t!” You can imagine I’d be happy if you saw the schoolwork I had due that day compared to what I actually had done.
   I figured I didn’t need my backpack, but by the time I got upstairs to put it in my room, I thought that I might want to take it to do my work there- or I might even be more behind then I already was.
   “Come on Bobby!” my dad bellowed at me from the bottom of the staircase. I ran down, slipped off my shoes, past my dad, into the garage, and hopped into the car.
“Come on dad,” I yelled tauntingly to my dad who didn’t even notice I came down. “You were telling me to go faster?” I jested.
***
   On the way there, we saw smoke coming from the middle of the city. We saw fire trucks speeding to the scene. “I wonder what’s going on,” I whispered to myself. I saw something in the air, and thought it might have been a helicopter. It seemed like it had wings, but I figured I was just seeing things.
   We eventually got to his work. The strange thing was I didn’t exactly know what my dad did. He just told me that it was some sort of office job. “So what are we going to do?” I asked him.
   “Oh, I’m going to show you around, show you want I do, that kind of stuff.” He replied while reading a message on his PDA.
   We went inside the big office building. It seemed as if the building was made of tinted glass, and I guess I was right. From the inside, you could look out at the walls, if you could call them that, and see a tinted version of the outside world.
   We finally arrived at my dads office. “This is huge!” I exclaimed. “I didn’t know you were so high up!”
   “Yeah well-“ my dad stopped as the phone went off. “Yes? You have got to be kidding me… Again?” He spoke hastily into the phone with a worried look on his face.
   “What’s wrong?” I questioned him, mimicking the same look of worry he had on his face.
   “We have to go downtown, now. Bobby, my company fights extraterrestrial creatures, but we produce phonebooks so we don’t look suspicious. We don’t really make profits any other way,” he explained with a straight face. This couldn’t be a joke, he cracks up whenever he lies about anything.
   My jaw dropped. I stared at him, trying to see if I could uncover a lie, but there was no use. He gave me the same straight face right back. “So what are we going to do?” I said with my worried look intensified.
   He led me to a room with a metal door. He quickly punched a number of buttons on a keypad, and the door opened, with steam emerging like I had seen on the TV shows. I still was speechless.
   My dad threw me a white coat. It had a nerf gun looking thing inside of it. “What is this,” I mumbled.
   “It’s a stunner. Just for your protection if anything gets near you,” he told me. “You probably won’t need it, but just in case.
   “But what exactly are we going to do?!” I yelled. I was running out of patience.
   “You’ll just have to wait,” and he stormed off pulling me into an elevator. We got off on the top floor, and scaled a flight of stairs. We found ourselves on the roof, which had my eyes trying to adjust from the dark version of the world I had become accustomed to seeing from inside. A helicopter was waiting for us, so we hopped on and headed for the town.
   “There it is!” I screamed like a seven year old girl while pulling out the nerf gun-looking stunner I was prepared with. My father pulled out a rifle looking thing. He pointed at- A dinosaur!
   “We weren’t trained to fight dinosaurs,” my dad grunted. “How in the world did he get here…?”
   My dad took a shot, and it hit the dinosaur right in the eye. It let out a gigantic roar, to go along with its gigantic self. Every step it took made a pothole. He took another shot, but it was off and the gun bounced back, knocking my dad off balance.
   “Wha-“ the pilot shrieked. My dad had hit the top bar of the copter and we did a complete spin from the force, which left the pilot hanging off of the side.
   “FLY THE COPTER KID!” the guy yelled at the top of his lungs. I saw the dinosaur chasing some kids from the school that our soccer team played two days ago, and cars getting stuck in the potholes the dinosaur was making.
   “But I don’t know how!” I squealed.
   “DO YOU THINK I CARE?!” My dad was holding onto the pilot while screaming at me, and also taking multiple shots at the dinosaur.
   I grabbed the steering wheel. Something was going wrong. I was turning while switching gears, and the roter got locked up while I was turning left… We were headed straight for the dinosaur! I saw my dad fall-
CR-R-RUUUUUUUNCH
***
   I woke up in the hospital. My dad was in the bed next to me. “What happened?” I said sheepishly. He was sleeping, so he couldn’t answer my question. I went ahead and took a rest.
   I whistled for a cab and when it came near the. Licensplate said "fresh" and had a dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare. But I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air
   I pulled up to a house about seven or eight. And I yelled to the cabby "yo, home smell you later". Looked at my kingdom I was finally there. To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air