Who, of you boyagers, Have stolen the Sampo?

[silvertone]

The sampo....it was right here, but now it is gone....who has taken the Great Sampo??   The curse of the Frijid Seas upon you!!! Relinquish the Sampo or be slayed demonhorde.

[Socks]

i fucking took it, what are you going to do about it hombre? 

[silvertone]

i fucking took it, what are you going to do about it hombre? 

You've been cursed, deadly snakes will bite at your ankles when you try to sleep and birds will cloud your vision by shitting on your windshield.

this is the First Curse of the Stolen Sampo.

[Socks]

fuck, i did notice more bird shit than usual on my windshield.
tonight this fucking beetle looking thing landed on my windshield and stayed there for like 20 fucking minutes as i drove around. when the car would stop, it would deposit this little liquid poop material and then move to another spot.

[silvertone]

it will only get worse, and this is simply the first curse of the Sampo.