Jesus Almost Fucked Me Sideways

[Socks]

So V and I were in school today, on the same day, no small feat mind you. And after a few hours of shooting the breeze, as going to class is out of the question, we decided to walk about the campus. We ended up in the school book store and were looking at the collection up for sale. While browsing we were discussing, reading, literature, future plans, classic books etc... This is when V finds a most excellent discovery, a moderately sized yellow cover book rightly titled "God is not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything". Immediately both of us were in awe and great joy over the find. V did not have enough cash to purchase the book and there was only one copy, fearing the worse to wait I decided to buy it. While checking to see if I had enough money I took my wallet out and placed it on a shelf as I counted my cheddar. I eventually purchased the book and we read excerpts and a few quotes of it while awaiting for noon to come around so we could go home.

V read it on the bus ride home while I listed to music, upon arriving at the stop I realized I no longer had my wallet and had lost it. Panic set in, I had no money in it as I always keep 90% of my cash in a separate pocket just in case something like this happens or I get robbed. But still I have all of my identification and other significant items in my wallet. As I got home I realized I must have left it on the store shelf when I was counting my money to buy the book.

It then set in the irony, almost as if I had received a divine bitch slap for my blasphemy both proving the title of the book correct and making the concept of divine intervention more ambiguous. How funny that I should lose a very significant and precious item, my wallet, while in the process of purchasing a book denouncing religion. The very fact that this book is based on religion proves that religion distracted me and caused me indirectly to lose my wallet. Hence metaphorically poisoning my purchase, and therefore proving the title of "how religion poisons everything".

When I got home I called the store and to my great relief the guy there told me that my wallet had been found and was up at the Information Desk and that I could claim it anytime. And so my fellow members that is the story of how Socks came this close to getting preverbially fucked in the ass sideways by Jesus, yet again.

Here is my precious...



God is not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

[Daddy]

Who found your wallet?

[Socks]

Who found your wallet?

One of the store employees while fixing the books, she then turned it in to the Information Center (Lost and Found).

[V]

I was wondering why you walked backed to the bus. 

[Snorkel]

The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins is the best of those sort of books, if you're looking to read one. I think it's more fun to read books that try to prove Christianity, though.

[Socks]

The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins is the best of those sort of books, if you're looking to read one. I think it's more fun to read books that try to prove Christianity, though.

Thanks I'll check it out sometimes, and I can imagine they would be fun but my IQ would most likely go down instead of up after reading it so I shall refrain from such an exercise in stupidity.

[V]

Thanks I'll check it out sometimes, and I can imagine they would be fun but my IQ would most likely go down instead of up after reading it so I shall refrain from such an exercise in stupidity.

and futility

[Knig]

Sometimes I wonder when the first inspiration for the existence of an omnipotent being occurred..  

[V]

Sometimes I wonder when the first inspiration for the existence of an omnipotent being occurred..  

that damned superman! he's everywhere! 

[Snorkel]

Thanks I'll check it out sometimes, and I can imagine they would be fun but my IQ would most likely go down instead of up after reading it so I shall refrain from such an exercise in stupidity.

it'll go down either way, all of those books are like listening to kids argue for a piece of candy or something

if you want to get some smart, read The Fabric of The Cosmos by Brian Greene or something

[guff]

if you want to get some smart, read The Fabric of The Cosmos by Brian Greene or something

smart in the sense that you'll have a vague idea of what string theory et al. is but not understand the implications of it
well okay that's true for string theorists already but whatever

also, it doesn't make you smart

[V]

smart in the sense that you'll have a vague idea of what string theory et al. is but not understand the implications of it
well okay that's true for string theorists already but whatever

also, it doesn't make you smart

"get some smart" as in obtain knowledge

[Daddy]

et al.

clucky et al.  

[Socks]

if you want to get some smart, read The Fabric of The Cosmos by Brian Greene or something

I've already seen (his) the NOVA two hour special on String Theory so I'd rather finish reading a Brief History of Time by Hawking first.

[guff]

clucky et al. 

wow thanks for making the connection between a commonly used latin phrase and a user's name good job there jamie valentine

"get some smart" as in obtain knowledge

the depth of such knowledge is dubious