I'm trying to be covert but they keep making sound :(
Has anyone shushed you yet
Nah
I got out of there unscathed
That's when you just cough loudly a bunch
Quote from: David on November 08, 2018, 03:38:10 PMThat's when you just cough loudly a bunch
Jesus Christ look at this amateur. If you cough, you draw attention to yourself. If suddenly people are looking at you AND manage to hear your farts, game over. The only right move is to act like you're not farting at all. Maybe a second or two after give the most subtle look around your immediate area, but that's it.
Do you even fart in public? Frankly I'm embarrassed for you.
Damn we've got a professional crop duster over here
Pfffffffffffft.
He's nothing compared to me.
spread ur cheeks a part you noob
this reminds me- when i was touring my friend ben, i asked to borrow some toilet paper from him and said i just needed a few squares. he was perplexed because he said he usually uses a couple dozen squares. apparently he doesnt spread his cheeks when he shits so he would get shit all over his cheeks, while i just had to dab it off of my butthole basically. the next time he took a shit he took my advice and was impressed with how little toilet paper he needed
it's been a couple months since then and i occasionally wonder if ben is spreading his cheeks or not when he shits now
Quote from: antmaster5000 on November 09, 2018, 09:09:20 AMspread ur cheeks a part you noob
Great advice.
Quote from: antmaster5000 on November 09, 2018, 09:11:28 AMthis reminds me- when i was touring my friend ben, i asked to borrow some toilet paper from him and said i just needed a few squares. he was perplexed because he said he usually uses a couple dozen squares. apparently he doesnt spread his cheeks when he shits so he would get shit all over his cheeks, while i just had to dab it off of my butthole basically. the next time he took a shit he took my advice and was impressed with how little toilet paper he needed
it's been a couple months since then and i occasionally wonder if ben is spreading his cheeks or not when he shits now
ALSO GREAT ADVICE HOLY SHIT
Quote from: ClassicTyler on November 09, 2018, 09:13:51 AMQuote from: antmaster5000 on November 09, 2018, 09:09:20 AMspread ur cheeks a part you noob
Great advice.
Quote from: antmaster5000 on November 09, 2018, 09:11:28 AMthis reminds me- when i was touring my friend ben, i asked to borrow some toilet paper from him and said i just needed a few squares. he was perplexed because he said he usually uses a couple dozen squares. apparently he doesnt spread his cheeks when he shits so he would get shit all over his cheeks, while i just had to dab it off of my butthole basically. the next time he took a shit he took my advice and was impressed with how little toilet paper he needed
it's been a couple months since then and i occasionally wonder if ben is spreading his cheeks or not when he shits now
ALSO GREAT ADVICE HOLY SHIT
yeah the situation made me genuinely curious how many people are just getting shit all over their ass and wasting time and toilet paper as a result
since you don't learn about techniques like this during potty training (although you should) and you kind of have to figure it out yourself
On a related note I ordered a bidet for that very reason so I won't need the advice for home poops.
Work poops, however, this is a game changer.
Quote from: ClassicTyler on November 09, 2018, 09:17:51 AMOn a related note I ordered a bidet for that very reason so I won't need the advice for home poops.
Work poops, however, this is a game changer.
what bidet did you order? i dont know why i don't have one lol
https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1541784358&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet
I got the white color.
Quote from: ClassicTyler on November 09, 2018, 09:26:14 AMhttps://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1541784358&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet
I got the white color.
nice
while i was in se asia i got really used to using "bum guns" (basically this http://a.co/d/2JdpGFM ) and i'm wondering what the advantages are of one like you are getting. less effort for the blast? i remember it being kind of annoying angling the bum guns so they squirted your asshole but didnt shoot out of the toilet. that being said once i got the hang of them i didn't mind at all
I'll just turn the knob and hope it gets the right spots.