My buddy, we'll call him "craig" had this pet rock since kindergarden. The rock's name was, let's call him "jhonny". The rock was some kind of polished volcanic ash. Over the years, a thumb print had formed in the center of the pet rock where craig had rubbed whenever he was stressed.
He lost it last week, or it ran away and he robbed a gas station at knifepoint.
what a sad day in american history when we are robbed by the very sendiment we founded this country on
bunch of rock grabbin bastards