Today I have to break the news to my mom that I accomplished nothing this semester. And then drive home so I can hear it from her in person. I know she's going to let me have it. Like, I know that it's my life and my decision to fuck up in school and it shouldn't be her concern really, but still, she's my mom so she's still gonna express her disappointment. I feel like such shit.
I couldn't even tell her until the LAST MINUTE. She called last night and kind of offhandedly asked, "so what do you think your grades will be like? As and Bs?" And I basically just said yes and I couldn't tell her that actually it'll be more like a C, two Fs, and two incompletes.
I'm 23 and what my mother thinks shouldn't concern me as much as it does...but I can't help it. Fuck. :(
Mommy will always have that guilt hold on some part of your life. :)
E-mail I sent to my mom:
QuoteOkay, I have no idea how to sugarcoat this, and I should have never waited so long to tell you, but I was never sure about how you'd react and I never really wanted to talk about because I already felt horrible enough about it. I lied - there won't be As and Bs on that grade report. I completely dropped the ball this semester. I was unambitious and depressed and pretty much stopped going to class in the middle of September. For a long time I hardly even left my room. I became entirely reclusive. I told myself I'd pull myself out of it, but it never happened. I fell more and more behind and missed tests and papers and everything went to hell and I just gave up. I didn't even want to come back next semester. I felt like I couldn't be a teacher let alone manage a career at all, ever. I started seriously doubting how much I even ever wanted to be a teacher. I'm still not sure about it, honestly.
So yeah, just thought I should let you know before you find out on your own. Two professors are giving me incompletes - they were kind enough to understand that I screwed up but wanted to make up for it next time. That way I can just take the classes over but not have to pay to re-register for them. Another never got back to me about a possible incomplete, so that might just be an F. Another wouldn't have it and I'm sure I'll just get an F (Brit. and World Poetry). In the Methods class I'll probably have a C.
I really don't want to get into some big argument with you so I hope you'll understand when I say that I never meant for all this crap to happen and that it's my mistake and I'll fix it myself next semester and you don't have to worry about it. No yelling, please. I feel bad enough already. I'm sorry I pretty much lied to you through the whole semester. I just didn't want to worry or disappoint you.
Jesus, I sound like such a fucking crybaby. I feel so goddamn stupid about this whole thing.
every Rose has it's thorns...
but in All Seriousness: good luck.
Kaz, don't get more down on yourself than you need to. You are just going through a bump in the road at the moment. You may not think so, but you will pull yourself out of it and get back on track. Everyone has a rough semester or two where they don't do anything. Just make a recovery next semester and use the anger about this semester to motivate you to do well.
Your mother should not freak out on you. She has a right to be disappointed, but she shouldn't be yelling or anything about it. You don't know what happened and genuinely regret it.
I just got off the phone with her. It went a lot better than expected. It's easy for me to forget just how awesome of a mom I have. She was a bit stern, yeah, and obviously worried, but she was understanding and we talked about possibilities for the future and she assured me that no matter what happens I'll always have a place to stay with her, even if the shit hits the fan and I completely drop out and have nowhere to go.
Jesus christ, now I feel bad for even thinking that she might be mad at me and yell at me and stuff. I can't believe I was THAT worried about her reaction.
Fuck, I love her. :(
Wow, that's really scary... I'm glad you have a mom who is so supportive, good luck on your next semester buddy
I-I'm not the only one who didn't give a fuck this semester?
Nice.
wrench;
I've accomplished so much.
It is. After last semester and a horrible start to the semester I'm quite proud of how I turned things around.
I managed to turn an incomplete/F to an A, get a nice start on my senior project, do well in 2 of my classes, and salvage a grade in a class I was definitely going to fail if I didn't stop fucking up.
Not bragging just sharing my pride in a relevant thread.
You can do better next semester. happydood;
Quote from: Khadafi on December 14, 2011, 08:37:56 AM
It is. After last semester and a horrible start to the semester I'm quite proud of how I turned things around.
I managed to turn an incomplete/F to an A, get a nice start on my senior project, do well in 2 of my classes, and salvage a grade in a class I was definitely going to fail if I didn't stop fucking up.
Not bragging just sharing my pride in a relevant thread.
You can do better next semester. happydood;
Kaz: "Guys, I did really poorly in my classes and I'm stressed about going home to face my mom."
JMV: "Well I did AWESOME!"
Kaz: "..."
JMV: "Not bragging or anything, cuz this is a relevant thread to post this in. LOLOLOLOLOLOL"
----
JMV, you are so
insensitive.
I am a bit of a dick.
My dealer told me this. baddood;
Quote from: Khadafi on December 14, 2011, 08:49:18 AM
I am a bit of a dick.
My dealer told me this. baddood;
Most coons generally are. cry;
true story. i have to bite my tongue and pretend to be nice to the idiots who come in all angry Y MY WIRELESS NOT WORK IT WAS WORK THEN IT NOT WORK. YOU GUYS BROKE IT
Nigga your wireless switch was off.
also good luck kaz
see i am nice man
my grades this semester will likely be three As and three other classes whose grade might either be D, F, or incomplete, and a D is looking very unlikely for two of them >_<'
at least the classes I screwed up on aren't related to my major and don't matter in terms of my prerequisites for other classes
Quote from: Azunyan on December 14, 2011, 06:42:00 AM
I just got off the phone with her. It went a lot better than expected. It's easy for me to forget just how awesome of a mom I have. She was a bit stern, yeah, and obviously worried, but she was understanding and we talked about possibilities for the future and she assured me that no matter what happens I'll always have a place to stay with her, even if the shit hits the fan and I completely drop out and have nowhere to go.
Jesus christ, now I feel bad for even thinking that she might be mad at me and yell at me and stuff. I can't believe I was THAT worried about her reaction.
Fuck, I love her. :(
Yeah it's hard to forget moms are like that :3
I'm glad it worked out though. My mom is the same way it's really nice.
Quote from: Hippopo on December 14, 2011, 08:26:45 AM
I-I'm not the only one who didn't give a fuck this semester?
Nice.
wrench;
I could see the just complete lack of caring set in the last semester I was in school and just didn't even bother trying to go back the next one. I then didn't care enough to try transferring when the deadline came around and idk if I will this year either.
Quote from: bluaki on December 14, 2011, 08:57:08 AM
my grades this semester will likely be three As and three other classes whose grade might either be D, F, or incomplete, and a D is looking very unlikely for two of them >_<'
at least the classes I screwed up on aren't related to my major and don't matter in terms of my prerequisites for other classes
were these three other classes like mini-courses or something ~_^
also, i'm doing pretty well at the university of life
Quote from: Chompskyan Grammar on December 14, 2011, 09:12:58 AM
were these three other classes like mini-courses or something ~_^
also, i'm doing pretty well at the university of life
The ones I did well in were Java 2 (Fundamentals of Software Development 2; 4 credits), Discrete Mathematics (3 credits), and Computing Disciplines & Careers (1 credit)
The ones I did poorly in were Intro Psychology (3 credits; my main problem with it is that I missed one major test), Composition (3 credits), and University Experience (1 credit; some silly intro class for all freshmen here and the one of these I'm most likely to at least pass)
So most of them aren't mini-courses
I had to take a dumb 1-credit freshman class like that too, called "The First-Year Experience."
I don't even know, what exactly does it mean to take an incomplete grade? Is it like an F in that I have to retake the course from the beginning to make up the grade? How does it affect my GPA?
At my university, an incomplete is an umbrella term for "did not complete the course." It's up to the professor to decide how the student finishes the course and when they do, then the professor replaces the incomplete with an actual grade.
That has to show up on your transcript I'd imagine
Quote from: NPR on December 14, 2011, 11:27:09 AM
That has to show up on your transcript I'd imagine
well duh
but it doesn't affect GPA as far as i know
Quote from: NPR on December 14, 2011, 11:27:09 AM
That has to show up on your transcript I'd imagine
Until the grade gets changed retroactively or you fail to complete the needed work in time (then you just receive an 'F'), in practice at most colleges and universities.
Quote from: Chompskyan Grammar on December 14, 2011, 11:34:50 AM
Until the grade gets changed retroactively, in practice at most colleges and universities.
I'm pretty sure they'd make a note of it, otherwise more students would opt for incompletes
If a school just "gives out" incompletes then it is a joke and anything on the transcript wouldn't matter in the first place.
Most schools require some sort of reason for an incomplete and won't just give them because the student was busy drinking on nights before class.
Quote from: NPR on December 14, 2011, 11:39:06 AM
I'm pretty sure they'd make a note of it, otherwise more students would opt for incompletes
It's pretty difficult to get an incomplete though without extenuating circumstances.
Incompletes here are given out on a case-by-case basis by professors. I happen to be lucky enough to have some pretty understanding professors. But it's not like professors in general will just give them to anyone.
when I was in coolage if you dropped out you would receive a W for withdrawal and you'd have to pay for the course again
Quote from: Khadafi on December 14, 2011, 11:41:18 AM
If a school just "gives out" incompletes then it is a joke and anything on the transcript wouldn't matter in the first place.
Most schools require some sort of reason for an incomplete and won't just give them because the student was busy drinking on nights before class.
My composition professor put on his syllabus a mention that, if any of the assigned essays haven't been submitted by the exam day at the end of the semester (which was earlier today), it would result in an incomplete mark for the class.
I don't think it's a school policy and I can't even find info in the school's policies about how incompletes are handled
Quote from: silvertone on December 14, 2011, 11:47:04 AM
when I was in coolage if you dropped out you would receive a W for withdrawal and you'd have to pay for the course again
i applied for retroactive withdrawal and it was like i never even went to college 8)
Quote from: silvertone on December 14, 2011, 11:47:04 AM
when I was in coolage if you dropped out you would receive a W for withdrawal and you'd have to pay for the course again
yeah that's something entirely different, Ws are standard in pretty much any American university, i believe
Quote from: bluaki on December 14, 2011, 11:47:27 AM
My composition professor put on his syllabus a mention that, if any of the assigned essays haven't been submitted by the exam day at the end of the semester (which was earlier today), it would result in an incomplete mark for the class.
I don't think it's a school policy and I can't even find info in the school's policies about how incompletes are handled
if it's a small school, i would figure that policy on those are left to the instructor
this sounds sort of familiar to me...