socks tell me about kosovo

[Daddy]

there is an guy who always told us about how he is albanian and crazy shit from his home country

i mean he says crazy shit like how he loves hitler and stuff.

and talked about people shooting other people outside his window every day

then one day it came out that he's not from albania and he's an ethnic albanian from kosovo.


tell me about kosovo socks. is this normal for kosovans?

[silvertone]

in kosovo they make pizza using ketchup

[Socks]

i don't know man i've never been to kosovo.

kosovars are considered albanians who were left behind enemy lines when a bunch of white dudes in London drew borders for the Balkans while sipping tea and shit back in 1919.

they speak a harsh version of shqip, which is remarkable that they can even speak, let alone write and read 'albanian' after decades in another country.

overall the country is pretty dangerous and poor, but nothing unusual for that region. in albania, nobody shoots you for nothing, we're not crazy americans, if you get shot in albania, you must have done something and it is either revenge, or elimination.

a lot of people in albania like Enver Hoxha, our national dictator for 40 years. he was an SOB, but people respected him because he eliminated corruption and was brutally fair to all.

no way albanians like the Germans or Italians, the partizans fought both and hated them equally. as a people we know our history and it is not forgotten.

[ME##]

Judging by the way Shaqiri speaks Swiss German and Standard German, it's a miracle Kosovars speak at all.


Though, the British are probably equally bad at trying to pronounce his name.  The best is probably that jock that doesn't give a shit and just calls him Shakira

[Socks]

fuck that bitch ass . he chose to play for switzerland rather than the red and black. i mean, i know Lichtsteiner is one sexy mofo but still shaqiri. also his name is real close sounding to an albanian dirty slur, so that's how we joke about him.

[ME##]

what's the slur lol