ITT RP as a turd

[Houdini]

You are a turd.

What do you do?

[Samus Aran]

i bubble and slowly harden in the sun

[mariofreak]

id rather not but i'll give it a shot

*sits there*

[Houdini]

i bubble and slowly harden in the sun

You spontaneously combust. You are now a bunch of scattered, charred, bite-sized turds.

What do you do?

[mariofreak]

You spontaneously combust. You are now a bunch of scattered, charred, bite-sized turds.

What do you do?

regenerate as a massive burnt turd and create a turd army

...duh.

[Houdini]

regenerate as a massive burnt turd and create a turd army

...duh.

Unfortunately, being turds, your army can't do anything except sit there and smell bad.

A homeless man approaches. What do you do?

[caponehollywood]

Unfortunately, being turds, your army can't do anything except sit there and smell bad.

A homeless man approaches. What do you do?

Light myself on fire

[Houdini]

Light myself on fire

The homeless man mumbles something about Freemasons and takes a deep pull from his mysterious unlabeled bottle.

This appears to be a threat. What do you do?

[caponehollywood]

The homeless man mumbles something about Freemasons and takes a deep pull from his mysterious unlabeled bottle.

This appears to be a threat. What do you do?

Bend over and accept the pill.

[Placebo Headwound]

I magically grow limbs and go on a magical adventure.

[Houdini]

Bend over and accept the pill.

Pull, not pill.

[caponehollywood]

Pull, not pill.

Fine, then accept whatever's in the bottle.

[~Fiesta~]

Slowly make my way out of Kaz's ass.